Besame Mucho! (Kiss Me a Lot!)

This title comes from a jazz tune, but it’s what I’m thinking about right now and what I chose to write about.

As if you haven’t been bombarded with the fact enough already: today is Valentine’s Day. I got thinking about love (and snow; it’s still coming down, and I’ll be communing with a shovel after I’m done writing this).

Well, let me rephrase that: What I was thinking about first thing this morning was finishing the editing on a song I had written. The notes were there, and I’d done a lot of work on the parts for strings (adding directions for when they should get louder or softer), but I still had a bit more of them to do, plus the parts for piano, harp and guitar. After all that, I go back through and put in tempo changes at transition points so everything flows smoothly.

So, I came in from walking the dogs and turned on the computer, then went upstairs to get breakfast.

I got out a plate and walked over to the table and was about to put the plate down when I found two huge tins of Hershey’s Kisses!

Oh, goodness, this isn’t what I had in mind at all! In fact, I didn’t really have anything in mind, and that was fine, but … Ted had outdone himself and I started laughing.

A few weeks ago, we were in the post office, and they were having a contest to see who could guess how many Hershey’s Kisses fit in a Priority Mail box. We never did the contest, but Ted had said he was going to get me enough of the candies to do it on Valentine’s Day. We’d laughed about it, and then I’d let it slip my mind.

One thing about Ted, though: If he says he’s going to do something, he does it. So now, I have eleven pounds, four ounces’ worth of Kisses. Most newborn babies don’t even weigh that much! We’ll be eating them for a long, long time.

I think it’s wonderful when people get flowers, but I like my flowers growing in the garden instead of in a vase. And as for jewelry, I think that’s beautiful, too, but I don’t find myself lusting after it. But a small, unexpected gesture? That cuts me to the heart every time!

So what was I thinking about love? Well, love isn’t wanting to have sex all the time. It’s not always wanting to be around someone and feeling empty when they’re gone. It’s not thinking about them constantly and fantasizing about them and idealizing them. Those states are better known as horniness, obsession, and infatuation. Unlike love, they’re all pretty much temporary. If you think of these things as love, then you will be forever disappointed because they can never last forever. Love is what happens in a relationship after all the newness has worn out of it.

Love is something that develops over a long period. It’s accepting someone with all their traits, some good, some bad. It’s allowing the person to be vulnerable with you, and being vulnerable with them in turn. It’s trusting and earning trust, even though you might sometimes screw up and have to rebuild that trust.

St. Paul wrote a great passage in 1 Corinthians on love, and it’s read at many weddings. One thing not included in that passage, though, is that love is surprising. It comes upon you when you least expect it, taps you on the shoulder, and takes your breath away.

Or, it interrupts your daily progress with moments of sheer delight and laughter, like the one I had this morning at my dining room table.

Ted said he’d thought about raining Kisses on me just after midnight. It’s a funny idea, but I’m glad he didn’t. Ecko is a chocolate freak, and any stray candies that went to the floor would most likely have ended up in his belly. Chocolate is very bad for dogs, not to mention the foil they’re wrapped in.

So, I’ll probably get many moments of laughter over this Valentine’s Day.

And now, I’m off to eat a Kiss or two and then go play in the snow.

Explore posts in the same categories: Dogs, Family and Friends, Food, music, Special Days, spirituality

6 Comments on “Besame Mucho! (Kiss Me a Lot!)”

  1. ombudsben Says:

    Good for Ted! It sounds like you married well.

    (I’ll bet you polish off at least half of those Hershey’s kisses within a month.)

  2. tobeme Says:

    A wonderul suprise from Ted! That’s the way to do it, keep you guessing.
    Your article on what love is and isn’t is very good!
    The only thing I would add is that “love” is truly “love” when it is unconditional!

  3. halfnotes Says:


    I don’t know … have you seen the size of the stash?!! Maybe a few years ago, when I was a chocolate freak. Don’t get my wrong. I still love the stuff, but I don’t (usually) have an addiction to it. I’ll let you all know when we finish them.

  4. halfnotes Says:


    I kind of assumed that that was a given, but yes, the unconditional part is the most important, and often the most difficult!

  5. ombudsben Says:

    I guess I was extrapolating my own ability to sit at a desk and keep unwrapping and popping into my mouth, then taking that times 30!

    But you’re right, it’s an awful lot of chocolate. And after a couple days it’s easy to get sated …

  6. halfnotes Says:

    Right, but I’ve gotta smile every time I see the stash!

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